Wonder

I recently read a quote from Laurie Beth Jones that said "In our rush to seek out certainty, we shut out wonder".

It made me pause to consider the two facets of wonder: 1) to ponder or be curious about something that is beyond our explanation;  or 2) the sense of awe and amazement of something beyond our comprehension. I would love to ask her which of these she was thinking when she wrote that line, but in reflection, I guess both apply.

Regarding the first definition - there is an interesting trend in our culture where we must "know" (even it means being wrong) as opposed to tolerating the state of being unsure.  This is especially true of Western Religion.  I find it humorous, and not a little sad, that we can one moment explain that God is so vast that He can hold the universe in the palm of His hand, and the next moment assert that we completely have Him, what He thinks, what He feels, salvation, heaven and hell, AND the meaning of suffering all figured out. It seems to me that we cannot have it both ways - to shrink cosmic reality to the level of our understanding would mean shrinking God to the level of ...well, humanity - a really good, loving, smart human. But God is not human, He is...other.  Our need for certainty is just another tentacle of the monster of power and control.  We find safety in the illusion of control which requires assured, unquestionable certainty.  Part of the comfort, for me, is in believing that that there is someone bigger, stronger, and wiser than us in control. The cost of that comfort is that there are many things that I have to "wonder", because I am just not really sure how it all works (now there's a line you don't often hear from a pulpit or a radio talk show). 

But it does open my heart for the possibility of the second kind of wonder. When we must maintain total knowledge and understanding, we lose the ability to experience surprise and amazement. Its only those who are comfortable with mystery and uncertainty that can also fully feel awe and "wonderment" (love that word!).

So if the fear/awe of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom - I guess, what God is telling us is that the FIRST thing we need to learn is that He will always be suprising, amazing, a mystery, a wonder.  In other words, true wisdom comes from realizing we don't know everything!

In my garden, I don't want to rush - I want to be amazed at the unique design of every flower - I want to ponder how fast a hummingbird's wings flap - I want to open myself to WONDER.