Water Your Daisies

In a recent conversation, a woman was expressing to me the frustration she feels with her life. While her 40^th birthday looms ahead, she does not yet have a sense of who she is or what she wants for her future. “I thought that going back to school would give me that,” she explained, “but I still feel lost.”

My response left her even more puzzled - “Don't forget to water your daisies,” I said.

You see, I love my yard and my flowers, but after 10 years of trying to tame this hillside, I am still overwhelmed at the work yet to be accomplished. Granted, it looks a lot better than it did 10 years ago, but I still cannot look out at it without seeing the long list of things left to do. On the list of projects? A fence – but do I want chain link or wooden slat? New bark mulch – but should I use fir, hemlock, cedar, compost? The sloped path is too steep, but how best to grade it? Should we keep the high maintenance grass in the middle section or add a gazebo...maybe? Or a fountain? Are we ever going to get those blackberries under control? And don't even get me started about the varieties of perennials and shrubs to debate. And what is the point of debating without the funds to make any of it happen?

Our back deck overlooks this half-wild terrain, with a few specially placed pots which I have filled with colorful annuals. This year, I found a most captivating color of Gerbera daisy, not quite red but darker than a hot pink. I absolutely love it and while many things in what I call the “back 40” remain severely neglected...ok, avoided, if truth be told... I faithfully water the daisies that bring me a brief feeling of joy every time I see them out my living room window.

My point is that the Big Picture of life can be so overwhelming with its options and questions that we lose sight of the more minor things that bring us little moments of pleasure and contentment. Life, like my back yard, is a constant work in progress that I am not sure ever reaches the state of “finished project”. So along the journey, it is important to find those little things that bring us Life, Joy, or Delight; to give ourselves permission to set aside the major life issues to enjoy a moment of fun; to invest in those things that are unrelated to our larger life mission but make life more enjoyable.

I don't have the whole landscaping of my life mapped out...but for this season, I am enjoying my daisies.

Pruning or Punishment

I have committed one of the mortal sins of gardening and I am ashamed. I violated the third commandment – Thou shalt prune regularly.

I have a narrow strip of flower bed that sits on the edge of our property, hidden from view by our vehicles. I admit, it is sorely neglected. There is no sprinkler system on that side so I planted three different, low-maintenance shrubs that would grow up to be a screen between our property and the neighbors' even more neglected yard - two flowering red currants, two blue star junipers, and two barberry bushes. My faulty thinking was leave them to their own and they would grow large and full. Now, a few years later, I finally came to accept that they are a mess. The two larger ones ran wild and crazy - completely misshapen masses of chaos. They crowded out the other smaller ones which remained scraggly, sad little plants. To be frank – it was ugly.

So, out came my pruning shears, big and small, and away I hacked. I shaped, molded, and thinned, and by the time I was done, my pile of cut branches was bigger than the plants that remained. Some spots are now bare but will have a chance to grow in more evenly. Other places look dead, as I had to cut them back far enough that the dead undergrowth was revealed.

The same is true for us – more is not necessarily better. Our lives can become misshapen masses of chaos as we try to be all and do all - until God comes at us with his pruning shears. As He hacks away, the bare and dead areas of our lives are revealed. We can easily make the mistake of feeling the process is cruel and hurtful. Maybe we feel we are being “demoted” or punished.

I can assure you, that is not the intent. A wise gardener (One wiser than I) knows the pruning is for a purpose. The gardener is the one with the greater perspective. He knows better than we when our lives are getting out of control – when one area is overgrown and other areas are left bare; when the outside looks green and healthy but underneath there are places drying up and dieing; when our zeal for being “bigger and better” is actually overshadowing others – after all, a garden is never just about one plant.

Pruning is not a one time event but a regular part of a gardener's routine (or should be). So, embrace the pruning seasons of your life. He is making your life a beautiful part of an even more beautiful arrangement.

JUST BLOOM

The three things that stand out most in my memory of Grandma's yard are the walnut tree that dropped thousands of pods, the nectar-berry bushes that were 12 feet high, and a huge hydrangea bush that bloomed in every color of blue and purple. Granted, my memory may have exaggerated these a little but that's what memory is supposed to do with Grandmas' houses.

In hopes of having a hydrangea bush like my Grandma's, I planted one in my front yard about 4 years ago. This week, as I went out to do my spring weeding, I could no longer avoid the brutal truth. Mine is not blooming in every color of blue and purple. In fact, I cannot even tell you what color it does bloom in, because now, after 4 years, my poor plant remains about 2 inches tall.

Defective plant? Possible - but improbable - more likely, a defective gardener. It seemed like a good spot to plant it at the time, but evidently, the soil, sunlight, or moisture level of that spot was not conducive to bringing out the potential of that bush.

One of the most appalling Gallup Polls I have ever read was taken of the general American workforce who were asked if they utilized their greatest strengths within their occupation. Shockingly, 80% replied “no”! One commentary pointed out that this equates to America operating at only 20% of our potential.

In other words, 80% of us are planted in the wrong spot just like my poor 2 inch hydrangea! I can't help but think about how this dynamic plays out in the corporate arena (lower creativity, ingenuity, dedication, efficiency, attendance, productivity, contentment, turnover, etc.) and subsequently, the home-front (greater depression, burnout, frustration, drinking, relationship problems, etc.).

What are your greatest strengths? I have to believe that if God is the best “steward” (Jesus did teach that as a Godly principle) that somewhere, somehow, He makes room for us to use the strengths He gave us. It would just be cruel (and I don't think He is) to give us the heart and talent for something, and then thwart us from ever bringing it to fruition.

Please don't get mired down by the belief that your strength must become your occupation or a formal “ministry”. If so, great! That is certainly the best case scenario. But if not, still find your strength and find a way to use it. The world needs all of us doing what we all do best.

What purpose would there be for me to leave that hydrangea in the same corner? To teach it humility? To test it to see if it can be content never blooming? I am not saying God does not value humility or contentment, but to create us as “flowers” and never want us to “bloom” does not sound like the heart of God.

Well, my hydrangea is now in a new spot and is already showing some signs of renewed life. Who knows, maybe it will grow to one day be the the subject of my grandchildren's nostalgic memories.